Control Relinquished

I have a son who loves fixing and creating things. He specializes in taking things apart and sometimes putting them back together! This son loves exploring and adventuring outdoors and he thrives in his Trail Life activities. This son also collects knives. I've lost count of how many he actually has, but if I need a package opened, he's usually prepared with a variety to choose from in his pockets! A few months ago, I was being a nice mom and making his bed, which is usually a job I leave to him. As I put on the fitted sheet, I stopped and stared. What on earth? Sure enough, a clean slit through his sheet with one of those darn knives! In a panic, I checked the status of the mattress and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that it was safely untouched. I went back to inspecting the sheet and could hardly be angry. I mean, what 15-year-old boy would take the time to hand-stitch the slit back together?! I guess one who knew they better cover their tracks! Ha, well he fooled me f...

 A new year...the dead of winter...what better way to spend the day than tackling projects that have been put on the back burner for far too long! A few weeks ago I knew I needed to address my kitchen pantry. I had caught my husband in there with a measuring tape, who was dreaming up an idea to add more shelving and improve its functionality. To be honest with you, my pantry is nothing to brag about. It's barely a walk-in closet, perhaps more accurately called a step-in closet! But deep down inside, I knew it didn't need a complete overhaul; it simply needed to be organized! There were times I couldn't find an ingredient I needed, so I simply bought more. Then a few days later, I would find it and the duplicates would continue to grow. I feel vulnerable sharing these photos, but I suppose most people can enjoy a good before and after transformation! Yep, complete chaos that kept the door from being shut at times! I admit I felt very overwhelmed I didn't know where to st...

If you're reading this blog in the state of Pennsylvania, you'll know that we had quite the heat wave this week. It has felt more like the throes of July than our typical autumn September days! Of course, it just so happened that with the week's hot forecast fresh on my mind, I kept waking up Monday night due to an unusual sound coming from our air conditioner...and our house felt hot! Sure enough, by late afternoon on Tuesday, our air conditioner was running constantly and unable to keep the house cool. After a call to our HVAC repairman, we were relieved they could come out Wednesday afternoon. It was very humid Wednesday morning and our thermostat was already climbing to 79* at 8 am, but to our surprise, our "hero" arrived early! A simple part was replaced and life in the heat felt bearable again! Sadly, this experience was yet another humbling reminder that "comfort" is just as much of an idol for me as "control" is. Why is it that feeling ...

Our world is divisive about many matters, but one thing the human race can probably agree on is that life can be messy and complicated when people are involved! At the beginning of 2023, I committed to reading through the Bible chronologically and God has been opening my eyes to so many new understandings. Within the first few pages of Scripture, and woven throughout the entirety of the nine books I've read so far, we see that evil was consistently present in this world from the day humanity was created. Within my first week of reading, Adam and Eve sinned and were banned from Eden, Cain murdered Abel, the world was destroyed in the flood and evil was consuming Sodom and Gomorrah...wow! Evil, corruption, immorality, disobedience, and lies continue to be a reality for the human race from the start of creation until even now.  But also consistent throughout the Bible is the steady, pursuit of our loving Father. Even in our rebellion, with heartfelt repentance, God continues to forgiv...

 A few weeks ago, we were in the midst of some very busy days. It felt like I was constantly on the go, taking our children to their various activities. Busy schedules are depleting for me; I definitely function better when I have time to fully charge in my introverted bubble of home. I was running errands on the road one morning when Joni Eareckson Tada's radio broadcast entitled "Diamonds in the Dust" was a wake-up call. She was referring to the fruits of the spirit found in Galatians 5: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Joni zoned in on the last fruit. I admit that I typically view self-control as an ability to control oneself, having good behavior and not sinning or self-indulging. But in her broadcast, Joni took it a step further: what if self-control is also about slowing down and saying no to "busyness"? Do I have the self-control to say no and protect the health of myself and my family? It takes a...

Detox: The official dictionary definition says, "A process or period of time in which one abstains from or rids the body of toxic or unhealthy substances." Some of you may have read my blog post a few months ago regarding my health scare. After a few weeks of eating dairy-free, I saw some improvement, but I had a nagging feeling something still wasn't quite right. Plus, who wants to eliminate dairy if they don't have to?! I decided to switch gears and see a highly recommended nutritionist. After months of seeing several doctors with no answers, this doctor was able to find the issue in less than an hour! Surprisingly, I was suffering from an internal fungal infection that was clogging my lymphatic system. After two months of implementing a supplement regimen, and eating more leafy greens and sprouted grains, I am happy to share that I feel even better than "normal"! Another blessing is that I do not have any dairy or food intolerances, so that is a huge reli...

 Earlier this week our area was blanketed in a thick fog as I drove my daughter to school. Fog is such a weird sensation! It is difficult to see long-distance, but things can suddenly become clear as you get closer. Everything looks shadowy and our eyes take extra effort to focus on what is in front of us. Only the sun or light can bring clarity to our surroundings. I was reminded that much of life can feel like a fog. We cannot see the future or the end result. Many times we find ourselves blindly clamoring through life, seeking direction, and really only having enough faith to put one step in front of the other. Fog can feel frustrating. We so desperately want to see clearly but have no ability of our own to make the fog disappear. However, the light of the "Son's" rays can push that fog out of the way and bring much-needed clarity.  I was also recently struck by this odd sidewalk that I regularly walk on during my daughter's music lesson. My personality tendencies ...

Perhaps some of you were wondering why I vanished from blogging. Quite honestly, the past several months have been survival mode for me. I'm still not sure which is worse: an obvious physical ailment or waiting in unknowns with no clear answers. Back in September, I began experiencing some odd and concerning symptoms but pressed on with life, hoping things would resolve on their own. Over the following weeks and months, each morning I never knew if it would be a "normal" day with little pain or a "rest" day with inflammation and swelling. I bounced from doctor to doctor and from test to test. Life suddenly looked different through a lens of doctor appointments, referrals to hematology/oncology, and hearing scary words like lymphoma and sarcoidosis. There were moments when I was confident that God was by my side in the waiting and the pain and there were others where only tears could express how exhausted and scared I really was.  Last week I had yet another doct...

If any of you happen to live in Pennsylvania woods like me, you may have noticed an influx of acorns. It's almost dangerous to walk in our backyard because I find myself with insecure footing! They are everywhere and I can even hear them dropping throughout the day. With this abundance of acorns, there are plenty of squirrels to watch as well. They are very busy gathering and harvesting the crop for later in the winter. They scurry around, making use of every minute of every day. It's been said that when there is an abundant acorn crop and lots of squirrel activity, we are in for a cold, hard winter. Time will tell if that is true for this winter, but it certainly makes a lot of sense!  As I observed these squirrels harvesting their acorns this week, I felt my thoughts drifting to the spiritual similarities. The past two years of current realities have caused many of us to ask some deep, hard questions. As evil, deception, and confusion seem to prevail, it's easy to feel ho...

 Over the past few weeks, there have been several times I have driven on a road that was recently resurfaced. It has no center or edge lanes painted on it yet. Each time I traveled on this road, I found myself a bit disoriented on where on the road I was supposed to be! Of course, since I've been driving for almost 20 years, I had a pretty good guage on where I should be driving, but it is amazing how those faithful yellow and white lines truly give direction, guidance, and how easily they are taken for granted! It reminded me of our journey through life. If we're not careful to acknowledge the spiritual "guiding lines" in our lives, we can easily get off course and head towards destruction. Jesus needs to be our central guide through these twists and turns of life. If we continue to make decisions without seeking His wisdom, we likely will be setting ourselves up for a head-on collision. Likewise, the edge lines protect us from being sucked off-course and into a ditc...

We are quickly approaching my daughter's one-year "Spineaversary," as it's popularly referred to in the scoliosis community. July 17 will mark one year since her life-altering, major spinal fusion. I've been doing a lot of reflection lately, partly due to the many conversations God has put in my path recently with dear women and mothers going through similar experiences. As I've recalled some of our "God moments" from those dark, raw days, I felt led to share this one special experience that sticks out in my mind.  It was post-op day #4. I had just spent the night at the hospital, while Sheldon slept in our nearby hotel room. I laid there in the early morning darkness, listening to the city road below coming to life with traffic. I quietly texted friends, desperate for prayers and assurance that someday this horrible present would soon be in the distant past. There seemed to be no light at the end of this dark tunnel; would we ever go home?! Would ou...

Last weekend we accomplished our annual task of mulching our flower beds. It's a refreshing sight to have freshly edged and weeded beds get their warm blanket of mulch each spring. My husband and I also recently celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary and there is one step to the mulching process he has always insisted we never skip: preen! When we first got married, this was a new concept for me to learn. I had never heard of it or witnessed the delightful miracle of preen. The first couple of years, he would scold me for not putting enough on and sure enough, a couple months later I would need to visit my flower beds and weed. It was a task I quickly despised. Now I have finally learned that, when applied liberally, I can get away with only weeding twice a year! That magical barrier has become a time saver! I couldn't help but think how this can be true in the spiritual realm. If we're not careful, the sinful world will sow seeds of weeds into our hearts and minds. What i...

My husband and I love salmon, so when I recently found it on sale, I couldn't resist buying it. I was anticipating making it in my new air fryer and excitedly told him about my upcoming menu plan. The only hiccup to my plan is the fact our kids do not have the same appreciation for salmon that we do. In fact, yesterday as I prepared our delicious dinner, I was already hearing their complaints in my head. I admit, just the thought of the impending whining took the fun out of dinner preparation. Sure enough, upon their arrival home, their curious eyes caught sight of the asparagus prepped for the oven. Then came the questions of what else are we having?! I casually said, "Salmon and rice." Shrieks of horror ensued. You would have thought I asked them to go catch and filet the fish as well! One child was cautiously optimistic, another was woefully willing, and my third was a basketcase of tears! Even though the meal was delightful to my taste buds, my company was not. When t...

 "You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies." I cannot help but think of the Last Supper when I read this verse. Jesus reserved an upper room to have an intimate meal with His best friends, His disciples. Even in this last meal together, knowing the coming crucifixion, Jesus invited the traitor-to-be. Jesus knew Judas' heart and the hold the devil had on him. Jesus knew Judas would betray him; He even knew Peter's future denial of knowing Him. Yet, in His love for them, He prepared this table for them and washed their feet. And that is what He does for us. He invites us to His table, even with all of our mess-ups and our seemingly constant shortfalls! The table is for His beloved children and all we have to do is show up and accept His invitation! "You anoint my head with oil". In his book, "Traveling Light", Max Lucado describes the importance of a shepherd anointing his sheep. I never knew that bugs can kill sheep, but apparentl...

 "Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me: Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me" Psalm 23:4. This verse is, perhaps, the most familiar of Psalm 23. It's often quoted at memorial services or memorized from childhoods. We all face dark valleys in our lives and this promise can bring peace and comfort in the face of unknowns.  David, the shepherd boy, understood this reality when he authored this psalm. He knew that pastures eventually became bare and he would need to guide his flock to the high country in the mountains. With his rod and his staff, he would lead and protect his flock throughout the journey.  And we can trust God to do the same. He will lead us to the high country. Yes, the journey will take us through rugged ravines and dark valleys, but He will be there, guiding us through it all. Remember, God will lead us through...not around these valleys of heartache, grief, or death of a dream. There is some...